最近

我知道

我知道

我知道你们等了我很久

哈哈

好多故事要分享

但因为没及时在当下写下

感觉都没了

所以也没什么动力要写了

不过简略的我还是会交代下



我20了

衷心感谢为我庆祝的他们

谢谢一切提早庆祝的

当下庆祝的

迟来的祝福的
esp:

AG1 member,ah mai, yoke mei, susan, lichin, witch yen, neenee, wanru, engyew, abu, chyuan sheng, han lin,Ah Dong...etc....

我又拥有一个美好的一年

哈哈

还是那么的爱你们




接着

我又拥有一个像地狱的考试

过程是怎样

我也懒得说了

我不会说那是最惨的

因为我知道还有人比我读得更惨

但那对我来说简直是极限的破天荒

不过我还是活过来了

哈哈



放假了

一个月的假

到18/1开学

31/12 可能会与witch yen 他们去kl count down

希望到时会度过一个很难忘的倒数日

求主带领




今天去了马六甲一趟

虽然说已经不是首几次去了

但是这次不同的是

Ahdong 跟几位教会的弟兄一起自己驱车去

而且一路算是有说有笑

也发生了很多趣事

结论是GPS不是一百巴仙的可靠

哈哈

他们的毅力真是让我钦佩

我应该是考试的关系

所以精神不是很好

所以有点累

可能因此影响到我的体力

我们一行人：

jonathan, joseph, 秋帆，ah dong, 锌必 （翻译）还有我

我们到处拍了照

又走走 吃吃 喝喝的

玩得很开心

走偏了红屋地区

古墓

jonker's street

海边

海龟培育中心

本来是想看海龟的

谁知

今天Public holiday

没开！

不过后来我们又到海滩“跳”了一下

我把照片拍得很好噢！

可是我负责拍

没被拍啦

哈哈



发现

其实有很多人

还是抱着一颗很纯的心

对身旁的每一个人好

他们从来没有真的很计较什么

只希望大家融洽的相处，舒服就好

也许有时我们迷路了

大家累了，饿了

但是大家还是很有耐心的

彼此帮助，耐心的研究

包容，忍耐

犯错的急忙道歉

有的还内疚到……一直那副脸

哈哈

也只有这样

幸福坚固的友情才会被建立起来

今天，真真的我体会到了那份感动

友情

不是顾面子

不是希望得到回报

不是阴谋

不是利益

而是衷心的希望对方

活得快乐

活得比自己幸福



就那么简单而已


爱情

我想……

更应该这样吧？





我珍惜这一群上帝安排给我的朋友




p/s: 今天终于亲眼看了自杀demo片段！经典！！哈哈！！

最后一次

我又在这里了~

哈哈……

明天将会回家了。

感觉很好

希望明天路程一路顺利

不要下雨

不然，你将会看见树下有个女孩提着大包小包的

站在那里淋雨

哈哈~

老天~

别那么对我~



今天，很放松的来到faculty上网

听歌

很轻松~

领悟了些事

有些事情

不要知道的好

就让它成迷

知道，也未必是件好事

大概大概，你明白什么事在发生就好

不要追根究底

就好象鬼片一样

当你听到有怪声时，

不要去探个究竟

去看看是什么

不然，看到一些不该看到的

自己遭殃而已

哈哈~

大概大概

你感觉不妥

闪人就对了

反正

留下不会是个好事

去另一个地方吧~

不要期待自己会看到自己想看到的

不要期望些什么

当你期望时，你就把希望注入，

当事情没有你所想象的发生，

失望就加倍在你身上

要投注一丝希望

还是要以平常心对待？

我想，我互相学习以平常心对待

至少，我不会失望




Quote of the day:

Sometimes it's better to let go without knowing the real reason... because it will surely hurt more to find it UNREASONABLE.

bye bye my friend~

First of all...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO

WITCH YEN, Y-MEI, WEILENG AND ME~~

lol...

did u all realise that actually our date of birth is nearly the same?

16( witch )+10 = 26 weileng

19 (y-mei ) +10 = 29 me~^^

hehe....

we ..as the redbean said...

the world's most evil one have been born to the world 20 years alr...

how are we going to celebrate huh??

hmm....

gonna break down the world like how 2012 do...

haha...



okok....

back to sad news...

i'm going to off facebook, msn, blogger and bla bla bla...for mayb 3 weeks alr...

tomorrow i'm going back home le...

for study weeks...

this sem we are having 3 weeks study week ...weird right?

dunno how the stuff arrange the time one...

should i happy or sad huh??

happy coz having more time to study and prepare for my final?

or sad coz of too long holidays will hard to motivate me to study...?

wonder...

anyhow, i'm going to miss u guys crazily during this period...

25th will be coming back serdang upm for the ECE -early clinical experience..

just for one day then i will be back to my sweet home again...

and again, the bus company is going to earn my money happily~


to SCMC members - i'm going to miss u all really really much till nex year we meet again...

to my housemates - we will still able to see each other soon later...but still...i will miss u all one..

to my little "wujin" - i'm going to leave u a while and fetch u back maybe after final?.. i wonder i will have insomnia coz of sleep without u.... T_T

will miss people who i suppose to miss...

and to my stw friend! hey!! do rmb come and find me yam cha and hanging out ya!!

come and find me ! FIND ME!!!

esp on the date 29th!!! lol...*muka tebal

quite excited coz of will have a long holidays spending time together with family...

and tomorrow i'm going to meet my brother at pudu...

hope everything will be fine and enjoy the time spending together...

jump for the end of the SEM~!!!

HOORAYYY~~

*looking forward to jump for the end of the FINAL~!!!

1113 特别的一天

怎么说
感谢
谢谢你们
你们的用心
让我很感动

你们制造的惊喜
让我很惊讶
你们给了我很难忘的回忆

1station café的主唱歌手
Stuff点给我的《你怎么舍得我难过》-黄品源
虽然还是搞不懂为什么他们要点这首歌
但是它的的确确也让我有所感触
谢谢驵唱歌手的“祝你快高长大”

谢谢小buddy俊源，roomate子萱的《朋友》
谢谢子萱的“祝你早日paktoh…”
大buddy闻豪,AG1 member:Jessie, peiyi, iki, huishan, Julian, Josephine, jinkit, ah moh.
三件裙子我都很喜欢
很惊喜，很感动，很意外

谢谢Julian，Josephine为我奔波劳命
临时找2012戏票
谢谢你们特地抽空陪我提早过生日
谢谢为我制造惊喜
谢谢你们苦等我翻找礼物
谢谢你们的用心

谢谢今晚的一切一切
131109 ：一个很特别的日子

不要停下脚步

你可以很潇洒地放下过去

面对你的未来



你可以很清楚的知道什么是重要什么是不重要的

因此就算发生什么事

你都可以不受影响

继续走接下来的路




但你要明白

我看重这一切

所以我很难放下过去

重新来过



我没有那个能力

扮成什么事都没有

我没有那么厉害隐藏心里的感受

当发生事故时

还可以若无其事继续我的生活




所以请你

继续走你的道路

为你的未来冲刺

为你所觉得重要的打拼

不要停下来

回头看




因为

我想

我已不再原地停留

我回来了

我回来了

很爽的一个短假

我充电了

虽然心不甘情不愿的回来Serdang

但想到过一个礼拜我就开始我漫长的studyweek了

才硬着头皮回来

回家期间

我参加了友人的一个婚礼晚宴

那天晚上由于是属于有点“高级的”晚宴

所以，有稍微在衣着上费一点心思

第一次，参加婚礼晚宴穿成这个样子

有点不惯


那一晚，第一次跟不是很熟的阿叔阿伯谈的很愉快

第一次觉得自己是以大人的身份跟“长辈级”说话

有的还给“business card”给我

有点怪怪的

哈哈……



星期日，与家人去了怡保一趟

陪老爸老妈血拼原来也是一件很爽的事

老爸也很爽快地买了很多衣服

不是第一次看他血拼

只是，事隔几年

又能够看他“露出本性”

感觉很不同

晚上，回到sitiawan老地方

第一次，我以自己的能力，请家人吃了一餐

感觉很棒！





后来，剪了头发

这是最后一张b4剪头发的样子



我家后院的红毛丹熟了

结了很多很多的果子

难怪老爸会问我“几时回来摘”

搞得我很想家

才使我心情低落了好一阵子

果子是结了很多

但回到家，我却没去摘来吃

印象中好像是摘了一颗

然后就没吃了

怕发热气

所以就作罢

后来才惊觉原来果子会结这么多是因为

老爸一直都没摘下来

说是要等我回来才可以摘

结果我就吃那么的一颗

哈哈。。





难得它是矮的红毛丹树

长得矮，却生养众多

很厉害哦！

它也算是我成长过程的回忆

嘿嘿……



刚刚去了the mines走走

看了一套Phobia2

全程几乎都在惨叫+用外套遮脸

怕的要命

但结局超赞！

很特别的结尾

特别推荐！

看完戏，这里逛那里逛

只能说女人总是挡不住血拼得诱惑

已经尽量克制了

结果还是花了点钱

心痛！心痛！



最近很promote“笑”！

哈哈……

昌喜应该明白我为什么这么说

哈哈……

像是

Seven days without laughter makes one weak.

It takes seventeen muscles to smile and forty-three to frown..so, better smile always, or else u will get wrinkle at early age..

一个微笑

可以拉近两个人之间的距离

可以暖一个人的心灵

多微笑，让身体里的细胞也微笑

当你微笑时，你会发现你的观点就会与人不一样了

你会发现你变得开心点，乐观了

不管什么样的笑

开怀大笑、傻笑、嗤笑、猛笑、狂笑、大笑……

笑的力量很大哦！

它可以使你变得年轻，抗老化

避免体抗力下降

人也精神点

Be an angel to someone else whenever you can, as a way of thanking God for the help your angel has given you.

Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.

最近都很积极的“做人”

觉得时间真的很短暂

不想浪费时间


最近推动“把爱传下去”的精神

如果爱只停留在你心中

那份爱就失去了意义

应该把爱传给别人

让别人也感受那份爱

让这个世界变得更美丽，更温暖



有爱=就有微笑

有微笑=就会有健康

有健康=长命百岁

长命百岁=就可以做很多事=就可以继续的笑！！

哈哈。。。。。

回家

明天我回家了

我终于回家了

我郁闷的心情应该会有所解放



刚刚有少少的生闷气

特别谢谢：

tiong keat, 昌喜，洧诚，豆豆王子，cslee, weileng,witch yen, wan ru, edmund...etc...who gave me supports on that moment...

很感激你们的开导


让我从新振作


突然明白了一些事情


感谢你们的话语，陪同。


解除了我的疑惑、纳闷


感谢上帝……

没什么表情

我是怎么了


好几天了


就连呼吸都懒了




我的潜意识告诉我


我很累


可是躺在床上


翻来覆去


睡不着就是睡不着


呼吸优点仓促





我是多么的无奈我的伤悲

低落

低落

我像个活死尸

飘来飘去

不对不对

是跳来跳去


跳……


跳…………


跳………………

november

november...

seems suppose to be a month that full with plans...

holidays are coming...

couples are dating out...

which suppose to be a very sweet and memorable month to ppl..

but somehow, these few days i din really feel fine with myself...

not very well doing everything...

get emo easily...

not because of my status- single..

not really because of stress or sth related to studies...

not because of i'm busying ...

not because of everything..

but just that i'm not satisfied with sth...

i get emo for NOTHING!

i can't really find a reason why i'm being so easily provoked ...

perhaps hormonal change...

but i guess i still manage to control my emotion...

not showing any negative signs ...

missing my secondary lou sei very badly...

especially yen, cai wei, lichin, ah mai, neenee, susan, yoke mei, and so on...

and those i don't really dare to mention here...

coz for eg like wan ru, lik yin, eemei, huiyan, connie, charleen, those who looks not really close with me last time...

i don't know why...i just miss u guys badly recently..

perhaps u guys will think "hmm.... i was not that close to you last time, how come u will miss me one?"

perhaps, it's just the memories of our 5th form year...

everything seems so laid back that time...

we share laughters, joys and crack jokes all the time...

even if we were angrying, we still can angry in a very funny way...

i like the way we were last time...

we never hate each other...

maybe yes, but not that much...

maybe just one or two days, and the angers gone...

we made friends...

and since then we were surrounded by each others...

love, caring , funs were overwhelming us...

that was really good...

which we could hardly find as we grow up...

i'm glad that i'm being here...

upm AG1 surrounded by my lovely housemates...

though we have different characters...

still we manage to help each other to go through all the obstacles..

still really really i hope this can be maintain and last long always...

as friendship never change...
























still....

i can't find a reason of why i'm being emo recently...

after all i experienced a very different me last night...

which is medic night...

i curled my hair...

and looked really much different that i couldnt really accept my look at 1st when i finished set my hair up...

i like the look actually...

looked mature...

hmm....

a really different me...

Don't be afraid your life will end; be afraid that it will never begin.

training threshold..

i guess u're born to train my patience and my threshold...

last WARNING!!

don't try to challenge my threshold...

or YOU WILL BE SORRY!


p/s: i guess i'm going to throw u into refrigerator... you didn't mean anything to me after all...

我的标点符号，你看见了吗？

我睡觉

有很丑吗？


我吃东西

有很狼狈吗？


我冲凉

有很快吗？


我穿着

有很没品味吗？


我读书

有很懒吗？


我上课

有打瞌睡吗？


我嘴巴

有很毒吗？


我笑

有很大声吗？


我哭

有很丑吗？


我做人

有很失败吗？


我一个人

有很寂寞吗？


我的情绪

又很明显吗？


我的生活点滴

你能够体会吗？

如果。你来过。

如果……

你来过

请告诉我



如果……

你看见我

请你叫我



如果……

你想起了我

请你给我打个信息



如果……

如果……

如果……

你看见他

请你告诉我

crap at foyer while waiting for jamuan

now i'm at foyer faculty perubatan here..
lol...
waiting for the jamuan to start...
in other words...
waiting for eat...
i'm with "trust me i'm a doctor "shirt...
and an voir jeans...
which jessie and peiyi ( * wakakakakaka.... peiyi typing here!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!... leave my foot printssssZ!!!! lol... thx cy... ) oso having the same type one...
lol...-->>stupid peiyi..

and of course the worth 4 marks merit on my hand

the speaker is switched to the loudest mode i think...

i'm in a quite-okay condition recently..
at least better than b4 (unsatisfaction period)
at least now i'm in track d...
quite hungry now..
but yet the jamuan still waiting ppl to come..
and here still having a few ppl here ..

*wakakakkkakakakakaka peiyi here again!!! IM HUNGRY WTF!@&*^@#*%*!#^*^!#*(!&

(stupid peiyi AGAIN!!!!)


SIENZ...
keep on kacau-ing..
this is the inconvenience of online at public station...

nex week we will be having a "satu malaysia" night..
which actually a.k.a medic night in common...
having a very peaceful mood waiting for it..
not expecting or watever..

oh YA!!!
i gt an issue wanna share here..
my hair keep on dropping recently which is quite annoying me...
that jessie said i'm like a chemotherapy-ed patient...
the radiation therapy make my hairs drop in a freaking high of amount...
i really scare will become botak head later on...
@$%#*$!@#$^$#@#$%^!@

so...anyway...suggested by peiyi:
go CUT ur hair la..


* jom fri go cut la... i pui u la... wakakaka... a bo will b... keep dropping keep keep dropping hair... lol *

but now feeling like wanna keep it until after medic night oni cut it..
at least my long long sunsilk hair can be tied into some pattern later in medic night..
kakakakakka...
lol....
ok la...after medic night = 31/10/09 will go and CUT OFF my hair~
goodbye my love~~ my hairs~~


hohoho...
sampat....

i'm happy with my life now...
though assesments keep coming on...
esp the terrible CNS ...
but i guess i can face it with a normal heart...
immune-ed alr...



okay lar..
though the jamuan still dun wan to start right NOW..
i have to go now..
coz peiyi keep complain me ..
SIENZZZ...

frm tze suen:
hello!! im her roommate.. haha!!
now very sien lo...
and a bit hungry dy...
i wan eat many many fruit!!
wahahahhahha!!! blek!! ^^

dream

i had a long dream...
it was a long long dream that i ever had...
when i woke up...
i find i lose sth in my life...
sth important?


i'm lost when i woke up...
i thought i will never lost myself
at least i'm still clear of what am i doing now...
but each time thinking of the dream...
it cause me so much pain inside me, which i can hardly describe...
and it always remind me that am i doing the right thing now?


perhaps, i should stop thinking of the dream and back to the reality...
coz a dream will always a dream...
which will never turn into reality...

无声角落

失去了推动力

好象都没什么目标

活着

就只为了呼吸



好像跟世界脱节了一样

现在的我

眼睛是这样的 -〉= . =

除了累就是疲惫

忙了又忙

停下来时就好象失去了目标

不知所措

却也不想安安静静的休息

我想我是害怕寂寞




习惯了身边喧闹的环境

当瞬间一刻宁静下来时

是说不出的恐怖的



但我却不知该如何让自己不再恐惧

虽知自己是累了

想休息了

却怎么都不想静下来



一个人

开着千千静听

虽然有很多声音陪伴着

却显示得我更孤单

淡淡的

只有我与音乐



孤独的人总是徘徊在网络

但此刻

孤独的人却没几个

我们

静静的

没想着要彼此打交道

我想是

“同是天涯沦落人，相见何必曾相识吧？”

我们

就这样

静静的

陪着彼此





p/s :嚼着甜甜的巧克力

总算让自己感觉好了一点

回首的甜蜜

心情忐忑不定

不愿多解释什么

只深深地感觉内心的负担已越来越重

在我惊觉之前

它在慢慢地累积着

变成一颗大石头

重重的压在我心口上

已越来越不能承受



不晓得该如何解脱

在美丽的邂逅之下

留下的还是一场空




虽然有些事我努力想挽回

因感觉已不对

我不是最后才了解

只是不愿放下

不愿离开





曾经等待着重来

但确实你在很久很久以前已经微笑离去

是我忽略

我不珍惜

留下的回忆足以让我徘徊了好一阵子




我们曾经细说着童话

单纯的约定着

那样清晰

但如今已不再

已成回忆的一部分




情绪莫名拉扯

太深刻

太难忘

太特别

太喜欢

我还记得







再怎么

我还是会想办法停下脚步

在回忆里兜圈圈





雨下的脚踏车

我明白自己只是活在记忆里

只是

请你给我一些时间

去适应

欠你的宠爱

旧鞋子----但我想找双新鞋子

看完它吧，希望你会有所领悟：
来自我。


每个人都有一双鞋子

来陪伴他走他的人生道路

拥有一双好鞋子

它会带你走出一条好的道路






鞋子

你不能没有它

因为你有一双脚

你就一定需要一双鞋子

就好象上帝创造人类

创造了亚当就创造了夏娃





鞋子

你不能没有它

尤其如果你要走的是一条坎坷的路

你需要它来保护你的双脚

一步一步地向前迈进

如果没有它

你可能走得伤痕累累





每一双鞋子

有一定的吸引力

依每个人的喜好

买不同的鞋子

有些人喜欢拥有美丽外表的鞋子

有些人喜爱布鞋

有些人喜欢平低的

有些则爱高跟





每一双鞋子

会带出不同的感觉

有些会突出你的优点

有些就毫不客气地把你所有缺点都暴露出来

你需要的……是找一双适合你自己的鞋子





性格随性的-比较适合穿布鞋

性格火辣的-比较适合穿高跟

性格温柔斯文的-比较适合淑女可爱的娃娃鞋

不是说最近流行什么样的鞋子自己就盲目的追求

因它始终不适合你

你自己穿起来也不会感到舒服





买一双鞋子时

你需要穿一穿它

看看尺寸对吗

穿起来会不会不舒服

合不合你的感觉

买鞋子是一种感觉

是一眼就知道你喜不喜欢的

有些人说虽然自己不是很喜欢

但是只要穿久了，你会慢慢喜欢它的

见仁见智





新鞋子

你需要时间来察觉它是不适合你

可能杀那你试鞋时，不会感到疼痛或不适合

但穿久了

才发现

它在你走起路来特别碍手碍脚

让你走得很辛苦

那代表它其实不是那么的适合你





有些旧鞋穿破了

你还是不舍得丢

为什么呢？

因为人-是有感情的动物

我们会眷恋

我们习惯了穿着它舒服的感觉

习惯了

有感情了

丢了过后也许还会像买会同一双鞋子

但是

同款的，同尺寸的新一双鞋子

可能又不会带给你同样的感觉

抑或是时间过了

再也买不到同款的鞋子了





有些鞋子

当你看到它

很喜欢

但碍于某些原因

你可能没有买下来

回了家

过了几天

你可能就会很后悔为什么当下没把它买下来

你只能安慰自己说

也许那双鞋子根本不适合你

或是你回头再去买时

已被人买去了

到时你也欲哭无泪了

有些人说

如果那双鞋子跟你有缘

你始终一定会买到它的

但是

真的是靠缘分吗？

真的是“是你的就是你的，不是你的强求也无用？”






有试过明明特地出街要买双鞋子

但走完整家广场都找不到一双鞋子适合你心意的吗？

没错

鞋子，不是说你要买怎样的就有

市场上可能没有你所要的那一种

你也许需要等待时机

过了season出了新货再看看有没有

但，你的脚能等吗？

脚需要鞋子

有些人说

买着一些合适的

不一定要一百巴仙自己喜欢的

合适的就好

有些人则说

等等看吧

看不到自己喜欢的

永远不会买

可是脚真的能等吗？

见仁见智






有些鞋子你会因为它一个小小缺点你就不买它

因为它的那个唯一小小的缺点刚好是你最讨厌的

有些鞋子你会因为它一个小小的优点你就买它

因为它的那个唯一小小的优点刚好是你最喜欢的

不能说只差那一点点的缺点罢了吗

盖着眼睛买下就好

因为

可能你会因为那小小的缺点

在你以后穿着它走路时

你一点愉快的心情也不会有

因为打从一开始你就不喜欢它了

但

却能因为那小小的优点

你会越穿越喜欢

越穿越开心






有些人则在穿着新鞋子时

就会拿旧鞋子跟新鞋子比较

说旧鞋子比较好穿

但是旧鞋子扔了

怎么你也不能穿回旧的了

只能继续怀念

继续思念






有时拥有过一双鞋子就好

穿坏了

也丢了

就不要再想之前那双多么的好穿

穿过、走过一段道路就好

还有回忆

虽然不能重穿旧鞋子

但记得也不要活在旧鞋子的回忆里

因为这样

你就永远找不到一双更适合你的鞋子

don't try me!

now i know why already...

i'm not happy with that...

seriously saying...

though i happened long time ago...

nope...

just because it happened long time ago, and now only i realised it...

i feel like myself being fooled..

should i blame myself that being so unfortunate to meet these ppl ?

hmm...

the answer should be no...

coz anyhow, through this, it manage to bring sth back to me...at least...

but somehow, to those people feeling that this is fun to be joking around...

i'm speechless...

continue laugh and joke as it brings u joy...

but do think of whether this is correct or not?

being so childish playing around?

any benefits u gain?




to the people who being so childish of trying to challenge other people...

it's good if u challenge sth in a good way...

but u are challenging sth that is ridiculous and meaningless..

i wont blame u for doing rubbish things....

coz it's all ur freedom of doing that...

but just as a warn u not to approach and provoke me anymore...

as i really don't like your appearance...

and once again u try to do that again to me...

i'm sorry to say that i'm not just going to just diam diam anymore...

just don't try to reach my threshold ...

coz i'm having my own right to protect myself...

and i think u should at least respect me as a individual...

don't get close to me anymore!

watever reason u are having ...

I DON'T CARE!!

sth that obsessing me...

hmm...

1st of all....

a small little thing obsessing me...

i do not wanna mention who is this and what is this...

what i wanna tell is that....

i do not know this person "A" got what kind of purpose beside him...

i just don't like the way he appear and showing himself up to my life...

i don't feel comfortable to it...

though it has not really "always" or "often" appear in my life...

but once in a while he came out and shock me off...

and i'm really get his "surprise" for he seems know much of my friends...

no matter what purpose he is having now...

good or bad...

i just dun like it...

it make me feel insecure and i don't hope he will approach me again....

and i'm not interested to him...

just pissed off ~!

coz u are making me feel that u are geli!!




seriously, sth to just shout out loudly...

i just simply DO NOT LIKE ppl FFK!!! / NOT KEEPING HIS/HER WORDS...

esp for guys...i will just look down at you, coz you are not responsible with the words that u had said...

coz u do not know the meaning of 一言既出驷马难追

大丈夫一语如千金重！

没出息的家伙！不是男人！

i'm sick :(

i'm not fine...

coz now having a bad flu right after a bad sorethroat...

and now my both ear blocked up...

cant really hear properly....

thax peiyi that given me "ham gam gat" to drink..

and this thing relaly works...

coz right after i finish drink it , my sorethroat recovered...

no more pain...

*miracles...

hehe...winks**

thax her alot...

however, 1 hour later i realised that the bacteria (or virus, i dunno...)shift to my upper respiratory tract...

which then cause me a bad flu...

short of breathness whole night while suffering to study for the epidemiology assesment...

it was not that good after all (i mean the assesment..)

hope i still manage to pass it...

wondering: marks ....is that so important.?

and it makes people really get depressed and work for it ....put effort to get it...

somehow, i'm a bit immune of not getting high marks already..

haiz....call me "poor thing!"

i don't like myself too...

seems like don't have much motivation anymore..



recently seems like many of the couples break up ..

and some do make me start thinking....

love can last long or not?

i know the answer should be yes...

but somehow, the examples that happened around me...

doesn't seems likely to be the supporting eg.

some pak toh for yearsss d...

still end up break up...

some seems to be the perfect match...

but at the end still break up too...

why is it so?

i do not know...

and that actually do scare me away....

coz no matter how good is the "prognosis" seems to be ...

at the end....or somehow, one of the part will get hurt...

love....

can it be just as simple as possible?

that just making another part to be happy and sweet? but not hurting anyone?




http://nathan86.blogspot.com/2009/09/blog-post_9244.html

here i recommended a nice song...

no matter you are christian or not...

i personally feels that the lyric really means alot..

and perhaps the lyric answered part of my questions...


last night, i missed someone again...

because of YOU!! JESSIE LIM!!!!

STIMULATE ME.~

but i promise...

i missed a while only...

coz i DO NOT want to live in memories...

她说 -- 他说 3

她累了……

不知是种解脱/结束？

如果说是解脱

他的放手

为什么她会觉得痛？

如果是种结束

她为什么失去了知觉？



在他们之间，

有爱吗？

因为有爱

所以才觉得痛苦？

是这样的吗？

如果痛苦？

那爱呢？

爱的意义呢？




是他先让她爱上他的

却也是他先放弃了她

她被缓缓地楸起

却被狠狠地摔下来

她能够怪谁？

只能默默承受那被甩下的落寞




心总是痛的

问题还是在的

她却总爱对自己说：

睡一觉起来

什么事都没有了

会好些的




她总是逃避着问题

每次也总算让她过了一关又一关

可这一次

怎么一觉醒来

心口却还是隐约的作痛？

可悲的事

她却还是要硬撑着当没事




什么时候

连看见他

都有种沉重的感觉？

什么时候她的笑容渐渐因他而淡化？

什么时候她才能学会独立？




要拐多少个弯

她等的人会来？

守护她

不再让她憔悴？




谜底什么时候解开？

家

突然……

很想念爸爸……

比起妈妈……

他是一个我不是很常想起的爸爸……



“爸爸……”
“爸……”
“阿爸咯……”
“老豆……”
“Mr.Chow……”


“妈……”
“妈咯……”
“咪……”
“咪啊……”
“娘……”


都是从小到大，我叫爸妈的方式

很熟悉
很习惯的

有想过如果有一天再也唤爸妈了吗？




我有……

有时我常唤着唤着“妈妈”……

老妈曾经几次觉得我在戏弄她……

因为每次我都是唤着唤着……

没有要跟她说话的意思……

只是“叫爽”而已……

哈哈……



爸爸……

此刻我想起了他

凶起来可以很凶

玩起来可以很颠

有点害臊

有点含蓄

不爱表达

这就是我爸




他常引我为荣

他很少亲自打电话给我

因为他想我时，总是叫妈妈打给我

而自己在听筒旁边按着耳朵偷听

有话就写在纸上，让妈妈转告我

他就是那么的含蓄



他做事情总是小心翼翼的

细心地

有责任感的

他是个大丈夫

也是个大男人

他是个虔诚的基督徒。




从我懂事以来

他就不再牵着我的手

一双经历沧桑的双手

很厚实的

附有安全感的手

在记忆中，

从他手心传来的温度

就像水分渗入土壤的感觉

传进心里

暖暖的

驱走恐惧

驱走寂寞

孤单……




他一手赚钱盖了房子

买了车子

养大我们三兄妹

他的肩膀有多沉重

我无法想象

也没办法推测



感谢神，

他是我的爸爸

一个非常负责任的爸爸

给了我一个温暖的家

让我吃最好的

穿最暖的

我要什么就有什么

从来没缺




也感谢妈妈

十月怀胎

生下了我

一手把我抚养长大

让我在健康的环境下成长

感谢你聆听我的心事

开导我每一件事

帮助我每一个困难

谢谢你温柔地陪伴着我长大



爸妈，

想说：谢谢你们给了我那么棒的家庭成员

感激你们为我牺牲的每一件事

没有你们的栽培就不会有今天的我。





p/s: 一定是想家想疯了！

无聊的星期

最近想家毛病又犯了！

好久没回家了的感觉

自从上一次upm被隔离后到现在

也有两个月了

想家……想家……想家…………

最近不是每件事都很顺利

心情也平平

学习着很多事情

需要时间来重新调理自己的心态

不想再被无谓的事情困扰

“生活可以很简单

有时傻傻地过就好

没有必要太认真对待每一件事

只会让自己觉得沉重而已”

一位朋友跟我说的

哈哈……

也许吧……

原来要学着如何看开点野蛮难的……

我有时还真的觉得自己老是跟自己过意不去

最后折磨得还是自己

唉……

期待着开斋节的假期

很久没见到我家人了

尤其是哥哥……

上次我回家时，他都没回家……

而且老是以考试为由拒绝跟我在msn多谈……

最近有生活没目标的感觉……

没有什么冲进力……

等待神迹出现……

希望一切能如我所求的一样……

明天出街看David介绍的《杀人犯》！！

yay!!!

刺猬语录

刚刚看回以前的一个旧blog.发现自己慢慢的学会成长了

虽然有些改变可能会是不好的

但是至少我是明白了一些理由、原因而在慢慢的做改变

很多人在成长的过程中有不少的矛盾

像是：应该为环境而改变自己吗？

变得自私自利？人不为己天诛地灭？

不是的...

生活在社会不一定要把自己变得像魔鬼一样

处处想办法从别人身上得到利益

越是这样的世界，那就更应该保守自己真纯的心

让世界有增加一些美好的角落

有些人说我对他好，他却没有像我对他这般对我好

其实不是的

对别人真诚，是不会期待别人回报的

会说的人很多

但往往能够做到的又有几个？

之前的我对别人好

我不知自己是否真的有在期待着什么

我是这么想的：就算你没以同样的手法对我，那至少别伤害我吧？

但是偏偏，别人往往在一个不注意伤害了自己脆弱的心灵

不是人家不在乎你，而是你把别人看得太重

造成往往期待着对方会以心比心的方式来对待你

有时就是那么纯的一颗心

却还是会被伤害

他们不是坏人

他们有他们对待别人的方式




自己的方式只是适合自己的

别勉强别人以同样方式对待你

你的真心，人家会感受到的

很难说如果别人刮了你一巴掌

他要刮你第二巴掌，也许还能忍耐

但第三巴掌，我可不担保我会继续站着给他刮

给与以前的我也许早已一拳挥回去

但现在我想...

我会离开现场

我只是一个血肉之躯

我不是神

有感觉、有感受

我不做伤害别人的事

但同时我不想让自己赤裸裸的被人伤害

我想也没那个必要




刺猬的脸也许也写着：不要来惹我！不然你会伤痕累累！
哈哈...

忘了吗？

刺猬还小的时候身上是没刺的

长大了...

因为要保护自己的缘故

所以才立起身上的刺以免被其他的动物欺负

我会学习着刺猬的态度

小心翼翼的攀爬着

寻找自己的道路

How to live a happy and rewarding life.

Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day.


When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, "My purpose is to... today".


Live with 2 E'S ... ENERGY, ENTHUSIASIM, EMPATHY, and the 3 F's... FAMILY, FAITH AND FRIENDS.


Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and the under the age of 6.


Dream more when you are awake.


Try to make at least 3 people smile each day.


Realize that life is a school, and you are here to learn, pass all your tests.Problems are simply part of curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.


smile and laugh more. It will keeps the energy vampires away.


Life isn't fair, but it's still good.


Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.


Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.


You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagreements.


Make peace with your past, so it won't mess up with your present.


Don't compare your life with others'. you have no idea what their journey is all about.


Burn the candles, use the nice sheets. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.


No one is in charge of your happiness except you.


Forgive everyone for everything.


What other people think of you is none of your business.


Time heals almost everything.Give time, time.


However good or bad a situation is, it will change.


Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.


No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.


Call your family often.


The best is yet to come.



* taken from email.

8 minutes in library computer room..

after MS assesment, i dont really have mood to back to study again...
though my notes are accumulating once again..
but i just dont have motivation to start at least highlighting again...

homesick maybe?
i miss those days when i just need to go school and playing around in class with friends...and when came back home, mummy cook lunch for me...
and i have to rush and ate it as soon as possible as i have to rush for the tuition class on 2:30pm
haiz...
since enter U, many problems rise up...
perhaps we are not teenage anymore...
growing up and start to enter a mature life style...
many problems need to think of alr...
sometimes just feel that me myself think too much alr...
sometimes being too care of sth will eventually make u fall into troubles...

haiz...
not in a good mood nor bad mood..
just moodless...
later going midvalley go shopping..
tomorrow go genting with coursemates...
life seems very playful..
but i dont know why just cant cheer myself up...
i'm TOO sentimental??
it's not a good thing afterall...

feelings keep on accumulate inside myself which i cannot express it out in certain condition...
being mature...sometimes is really torturing...
coz we need to consider every action we are going to take...
the consequences if i do so? or if i do not do so..
how nice if i just can shouted it out and mess the thing up and dont give it a damn and chiao..
but responsibilities tied me up...
i do not dare to take the risk...


again 3 minutes later have to attend another class..
just feel like i'm a bit useless and my body cant really cooperate with my mind d..
since i wanna to focus during lecture but my eyelids keep on wanna drop down ...
mind not functioning well...
though i know what should i do and what i shouldnt...
but sometimes i just wanna do sth i shouldnt do and strive over everything...
AARRGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!!


what should i do???
neither i choose go or not go oso gt problem one..
sien!!!
i think i shouldnt stay alone...
coz i will keep on thinking other nonsense thing...

by the way,
I LOVE MIX UP WITH CHURCH FRIENDS...
lol...
"BANGI SATAY~ ROX!!!"

她说 -- 他说之 信仰与坚持

很可惜

相爱却不能在一起

因为信仰

因为理念

因为坚持



明明互相欣赏

互相喜欢

到相爱相恋

但却到最后

因为不被认同

而忍痛分开



她有很多很多从心底的话想对他说

他同样也有很多很多事情想与她一起分享，一起做。

但偏偏，

这份爱不能被表达出来

多可悲~



他们

惟有维持朋友关系

互相推开彼此

像磁铁互相排斥




但心里的感觉是要到什么时候才熄灭？

会熄灭吗？

会因时间而淡化吗？

还是

他们会越来越累

因为明明想把对方搂进怀里、完全拥有

但却连一份过份的关心都不可以表露




如果是爱，不是应该经的起考验吗？

还是

他们会一天比一天更爱对方？

更思念对方？

那时间、苦苦为此仅仅的朋友关系，

是为了什么？




坚持与任性

往往只差一线

到底他们的执着

是坚持？

还是任性？

还是……比这些还要多？

信仰呢？




没有同样的信仰

等于没有同样的目标、路途、观念

那是该早日放弃？

还是坚守有奇迹出现的那天？



他和她*

他们*

是对的吗？

Tasik Chini trip!! AWESOME!!!

HI~~!! everyone...
i'm back from tasik Chini~Pahang..
it was a awesome trip...
Thank God that i insist to join them even i know that maybe if i join the trip, i couldnt even pass my musculoskeleton assesment...

Thank God that now, i have just after my assesment...
but havent know the result yet...
hoping i will at least pass lar...

the trip was really a nice experience...
though i have bitten by insectss and mosquitoess...
but i never regret that i join the trip..
haha...
we, the 2nd year actually responsible for handling the kids over there...
in short, we were like a sunday school teacher ...
i love the kids there...
especially when they were focusing to colouring the picture...
i have thousands of pictures gonna upload here...

LET'S BEGIN OUR JOURNEY~




Love is always the biggest~~





after a long run...
finally we arrived...
(so excited to see this road sign board...)




one of the view when heading to tasik chini...








tis is the tree that planted beside our house...




josephine 採了颗吃，结果才发现坏了！哈哈。。。




this is a place called - place to wash baju~ haha....




corridor~







yaya...welcome welcome to tasik chini`~
hehe...






i like tis very much...it will be very nice to be used when it comes to night, provided mosquitoes repellant is fulling working .！！ haha...
or else, it will be very hot and get bitten by insectssss....






totally there were 4 cars driving there..
Mr.Yap's, Kah Chuan's, Joshua's, Frankie's...
i was in Frankie's ...(Sabah-ian..)




yeah~!! Sing Seng was teaching us the story to be told to the kids~~
see~ how serious he was!! lol....




Hui Moon...the gal with guitar...
a very tough gal physically...
i like her style! haha...



this father actually playing cheat huh!! haha...
coz we ask the kids to colour the picture we provided...but he's so nice that he help his son (maybe) to colour it up!! haha...
so nice~




they were so shy when they found out i was shooting at them...
lol...they were really pure and cute!!
their smile were really sweet~!! just that i failed to capture the nice one...





she's Keren....a very shy gal too..
i was beside her to teach her colouring the picture...
lol...trust me she's really cute!!
when 1st we were worshiping, she already noticed me, and i keep stared at her..
she's really really cute!





they were receiving lollipop!! haha....




this "gal" was really really cute!! i bet she's too young to tell what's her name..
when i asked her what's her name, she just smile with a little bit fear ...
and the gal beside her help her to answer me pula...
and i asked her to write down her name on the picture paper...
she wrote "Mulan"
but the gal told me that her name is Sarina!!
so....anybody can tell me what's her name actually?
Sarina or Mulan??? lol...until now i still dunno...
lol...





they were (frm left): Keren and Angelena~





she was focusing to colour up the "caterpillar"..haha...




this was made by Angelena...haha...
she even colour up the eyes and tongue which we, the "kakak-kakak" din ask her to do so...
she's really funny lar~






Angelena and her sister...Nikita~
they were really pretty...
especially the sister Nikita...
looks like foreigner...
not same with the other children...
looks really different..
and Angelena...i can bet u, she looks even prettier than Angelena Julie~
lol....




she was unaware when i capture down her...
lol...totally focusing man!





these two gals...
wahhahahaha....
really funny lar..
especially the right hand one..
she clips her hair up with 3 flowers over her head...lol...
the left one...really sweet when she smiles...




these lollipops, we use it to seduce them to listen to us...
lol....






i capture this when Frankie was driving...lol...
the roads were really narrow...
hard to drive actually...







these are the views when we drove around the tasik chini...




they are not that "ulu" lar...
they got cars...lol...








sampat jessie...
cam whooring all the time!!








their houses...
living in a simple house with a simple life...




caps were really important under big big SUN!!






the four guys~~ haha...
F4?? haha...





this is TOILET!!!







we live in JONES' HOUSE...haha...
he treat us very nice actually..
cook for our meals...




the bridge...





the monkeys...
hahaha...





this is MR YAP actually..
haha...
looks like a drawing picture right??
nice nice~~ my photo skills are good! lol..







they were civil engineers~~!!!
geng!!!








the loving birds~~~ how sweet~




the view when i sit at the end of the bridge...tasik chini~





we were having uncle jones' meal~





Frankie...
haha...sit alone de? emo??
haha ....at the end jessie and i go and accompany him..
sit beside him...lol...






ah Seng with his boat!! haha...
the boat will sink if we use it..
lol....





*sign board~!




frm left: loving birds whispering...Jewel ...the right one..how pity! haha...











the last video must see!!!
haha...


till here 1st...
tata~~